Angry Black Woman Syndrome

Soooo...... remember the "teamwork" meeting that I was supposed to have with my boss this morning? Yeah so no surprise here but that meeting was actually about me. I come in the meeting and my boss opens up with, Well Dumbass (the nickname I have for the dumb little bitch behind the meeting) has considered leaving her position here because of your attitude and because she can't approach you. What!?!?!? Ya'll I went ape shit in this meeting and I don't think any of them bargined for what they got. I drove hard on Dumbass and forced her to give me examples of this alleged attitude and she had none so we moved on the the next topic.

There is a new person starting and reporting to Baby Huey tommorrow and she's trying to throw her lack of management skills off on me. She has had 4 people that report to her leave in the last 2 years. First she came to me and told me that she feels threatend by me because the people that report to her would rather talk to me than her. There's nothing I can do about that, I can't help having this personality and plus people will want to be around you naturally if you have a pleasant disposition and treat people half as nice as you'd like to be treated. I even went so far as cutting off contact with her employees on a personal level but again if you have poor management skills it will still effect. She starts going into how it used to frustrate her when one of her former employees said my name. Again, What!?!?!?! WTF am I supposed to do about that. Is that my problem? I'm going to make it my business to stay so far away from this new chick as possible. So when she fails at managing yet another employee maybe my boss will wake up and smell the shit someone smeared all over our department.

So, you know I'm going OFF at this point because the meeting was pointless and they thought I would just sit there and let them accuse me of angry black woman syndrome and put my thumb in my mouth. I wasn't rude or ignorant but I didn't take no shit off them either. I explained to both Dumbass and Huey that if they have a question or issue, work related, my door is always open and they can feel free to ask me whatever at will. I don't care about your kids, dog, husband, house or any other asinine shit about your personal life. So at this point Huey is ready to cry and she says, I just want a comfortable working relationship, and I said like the kind where you can ask a question and get a comprehensive answer? She said yes and I asked so how is that different from what has happened up until this point? She couldn't say anything and excused herself from the room.

Then once her posse was gone the Peacock flipped sides and agreed with everything I said, co-signing like that shit was going to make all this better. I told her I didn't appreciate being blind sided with this. Her response was I wanted to talk to you about the nature of this meeting this morning but I didn't get a chance because I arrived late this morning. I just looked at her, the meeting notice went out on Thursday and I talked to her 3 times Thursday and twice on Friday not including the hour long conference call we had Friday afternoon. Miss me with the bullshit because I'm not buying it. She had no intention of telling me what the real deal was and I'm no longer interested.

Hopefully I will be able to channel the bullshit of today into my focus to get away from this place and corporate Amerikkka as a whole. Hopefully by the time I make it to my car tonight I will have channeled this into a positive energy.

Planes, Trains and Automobiles

Whew! I am on my way back to the Go, I'm waiting for my flight in Dayton airport. I've been in Lima, it was a good trip but a safety audit, 2 marathon long business calls about some nastiness in one of my other branches and an hour long conference call and I'm wiped. Even when I leave the state the peacock is still fucking with me. I have to have a teamwork meeting with her and Baby Huey Monday, whatev. It's messed up cause I know what happened to everyone else is about to happen to me, anytime there is an issue with Baby Huey she's never wrong and the other person is forced to apologize in writing. Well I just might be losing my job Monday or pissing my boss off so much that she fires me eventually cause I won't be apologizing to her not now not ever.

This all started when she and I were talking one day and I stumbled upon a thought that was a good idea to act on. We brainstormed and she did put in 1 or 2 good points so I'll give her credit for that. We went to talk to my boss and during the meeting she portrayed the idea like her own, I didn't trip. My boss told us to write a proposal to submit to the President of the company. I wrote the proposal till 3 in the morning and sent it to her the next day to look over for grammer and error for a double check. She took it and turned it in as her own, I tripped and pulled out of the project let her fall on her face. Then after was promoted to Manager in a meeting my counterpart announced it and she rolled her eyes making everyone come to me afterwards wanting to know what she has against me. Strike three. She used to come in my office EVERYDAY, this is not an exaggeration, and cry about one thing or another. I cut that shit out only to have the peacock come to me about a week later asking why I don't invite Huey to lunch more often and ask her about her personal life, no lie. I went to my boss and explained to her exactly why I didn't want to work with her on any projects and why I didn't want to know her on a personal level and she acted like she understood obviously not or maybe she's having one of those pesky bouts of amnesia she has but now I have to have a fucking team meeing with this insufferable bitch to repeat what has already been said and I won't be nice. Both of them can miss me with the emotional bullshit they're kicking cause I have NO patience for that shit in the workplace. You know men expect us to be crying emotional wrecks in the workplace and she proves them right it sickens me. Flights boarding I'll rant later.

The Peacock is Crazy!!

I call my boss a peacock cause she kinda resembles one and she’s always hopping around poking into things like a bird and frightens easily. She peaks and valleys with the crazy but today that shit is full on bananas. She always changes things around that she says to you or lies and tells you she said something when she really didn’t. But, today crazy was at an all time high. There’s some things changing with my position and she expected me to freak out about it but I didn’t and I think that annoyed her so now she’s manipulating things to make me freak out but I’m Teflon so I’m chillin’. She moved up the changes from nov-dec to a couple weeks from now and then got mad because I wasn’t freaked. I swear she told me 3 bold face lies today and turned around to tell my coworkers the truth (co-workers that I drink with on regular basis LMAO). She always makes a big deal out of stuff that has absolutely no urgency, she’s just crazy. The only person that thinks she’s normal is her “teachers pet”, my co-worker whom I can’t stand, Baby Huey. Literally 6’2 at least 260lbs and cries like her dog died everyday about something, anything no lie. My life is a reality show, for real.

Growing vs. Changing

My Ex, keeps telling me I’ve changed. I think some background is needed here, my ex and I did a 6 year bid together (LOL well it felt like jail for me ) and I was released 2 years ago. We still tolerate each other every now and then because aside from all the nastiness we are good friends, because he and I were linked through music, movies, and politics but mostly music. So we’ve been talking a lot lately about some businesses he wants to get into and he keeps telling me I’ve changed.

This all started when he realized I didn’t have Nas new cd (which I still didn’t get till last weekend) and he accused me of not loving Hip Hop anymore. He says I’m different, I’m not street anymore and my corporate job has me trippin’. I go back and forth between him being right or wrong. I mean to be honest I don’t love Hip Hop like I used to. Wow I can’t believe I wrote that, it’s sacrilegious. It more than annoys me now because of the state of things. I boycotted the radio about a year and a half ago and videos shortly after that, being that the media controlled artists have that shit on lock. I can’t see another chain, or grill or vixen it’s tiring and sad. I still try to stay on top of my game but it’s not like I used to be, I used to have quotables from anything listen worthy weeks before it dropped but now it takes me weeks to get a Nas joint? What’s really hood? Hip Hop is a huge part of me and now that it’s in the shitter and we’ve been separated for a while now (Lupe Fiasco is the one reason I haven’t filed for divorce) what does that make me today? I haven’t changed, I don’t think, my better half has.

I feel like I’m having an identity crisis every time he goes hard on me about this. Today he mentioned LL and I said James dropping a new joint is wearing me out, he said I’ve changed. 4 years ago I would have never said anything negative about LL cause I remember the good days but today I’m tired of the lip licking and the romance. I know Ladies have Loved James being that way for a long time so if he hasn’t changed does that mean I have? I’ve grown up a lot and I hoped Hip Hop would continue to grow with me but some of the shit I hear today makes me want to turn my back on it completely. This hurts too much to think about, hold ya heads…

Corporate Amerikkka

Oh My life *sigh*

I'm in my ergonomically correct cell waiting on 5pm. This mf'er blows believe me, I sit all day with fake smiles and fake interest in boring convo's trying to figure out how much longer Miss Independent will last. Someday soon if God is at least conscious I will be emancipated but I'm still waiting on the text message.